JAPANESQUE

am gg over to my grand-aunt's tmr to celebrate her bday..
its gonna be @ her other daughter's hse which is a super nice 3-storey bungalow and most importantly..
she has 2 extremely adorable chi hua huas!!

okay dun ask me why and how they can be cute coz they just are!!
mabye they are the exceptions in the species
haha

anyway..
that got me thinking abt my own grandmother who's living alone in a big house in malaysia...
i noe im guilty of not visiting her enuff..
and mabbe not even caring enuff..
but looking back i was closer to my granddaddy..
but since he passed away 2 yrs ago i guess i just grew even further away from her..

i miss my grand daddy.
he was a big (*sigh) tall and handsome grand daddy.
he was super cool, drove a jap car, and always had the lastest models of fons!
ill ALWAYS remember that he was the one whu gave me my first fon..
and it was that moment that i realised he loves me a lot..
coz he gave me the fon tho it was just in a fleeting remark that i said i liked it..
i was so very touched he remembered.

ill always be reminded of him when i hear the cantonese operas..
the ones he played incessantly in his car...
i remember every cd he bought were all just versions of the same cantonese songs!!
and ill always cry when they sing it on tv esp on NKF drives..
coz i remember myself calling him at one time just to ask him if he was watching tv they were singing his fav songs

ill always rem the way he smells and the way his room smells..
sometimes in the wee hrs of dawn ill catch a whiff of that familiar scent of cigarettes..
i wonder why ur cigarettes always smell nicer den other pple's..
i guess coz u're my granddaddy
and u made me the youngest girl to ever buy cigarettes at 5 or 6!
when my head barely reached the top of the counter..
frantically repeating 'marbolo one packet marbolo one packet' all the way from the sidewalk to the coffeestall 50 metres away

my granddaddy was a handsome man
he was a policeman when he was younger
though one could hardly guess now (then) from his trademark bulge at the waist
im sorry i nv really told u u're the best granddad anybody could have
im sorry i din even have the chance to say goodbye
and nv really treasured u

why do i miss you only now....